Don't agonize alone! Make and maintain connections to other writers
Hello friends!
We’re in the thick of it now. I hope you’re all doing well and making forward progress, whatever that looks like. I’m a little bit behind on my word count, but I’m not terribly concerned…yet. I need to be careful, however, as I burned right through one of my co-writing sessions looking for a 1920s sports car for my character’s husband to drive.
I mean, how cute/hot is this car???
I’ll do another post or several on research, which is one of my favorite things but also an absolute time suck if you let it become such. I am blessed/cursed with needing to know certain things in order to be able to write forward—in this case, how my MC would have felt getting into and then traveling in this car on her way to meet her soon-to-be fiance’s family for the first time. Sometimes I can throw a TK in and keep going; other times not so much.
But I digress! Today’s missive is about community: why it is important and how to find it.
Writing is a solitary activity. No one else is sitting next to you, hands on the same keyboard, writing every other paragraph. (At least I hope not, that sounds awful!) At the same time, writing in a vacuum isn’t good for you or your goal of writing the best book that you can.
We all have blind spots, biases (unconscious and conscious), and at least one word or phrase that we can’t spell or use correctly. Never mind our favorite word crutches, facial expressions, gestures, etc.
My characters like to roll their eyes. A LOT. Some of them cry too often, I’m guessing because IMHO it’s one of the socially acceptable ways for women to express emotion in the world. (God forbid we yell or act ‘aggressively’ when we’re angry.) I’ve seen, multiple times and in published novels, massive overuse of the word ‘onyx’, to the point that I don’t know if I’d ever allow myself to use it.
Some of this you can catch with careful reading. But after a while, even the most eagle-eyed writer with their editorial hat on will miss issues both great and small.
Pages submitted with a query letter (or self-published to whatever platform) should never be the first time someone outside of yourself sees your work.
So, where do you go to find community?
Coaching
Obviously I’m a big fan of book coaching. I am a coach. I’ve coached other coaches. I’ve hired a coach and it made my book far, far better than I could have gotten it on my own.
How do I know? I tried going it alone. After all, I’d had the training; I should know not only how to spot issues but how to fix them.
Eh, not so much. As said above, we’re all blind to some degree to issues in our own work.
Obviously I’d love to talk to you if you’re thinking about coaching but I also know some pretty fantastic coaches if we’re not a good fit. And if 1:1 coaching doesn’t feel right, check out small groups or mentorship programs.
Critique Partners/Writing Groups
This can be a loaded option; I’ve heard too many horror stories of people who ended up totally discouraged, disheartened, and basically convinced that they were terrible writers, why were they wasting everyone’s time? Not only that, but there can be racism, misogyny, classism…basically a potential hotbed of bias, whether intentional or unconscious.
So why the heck would I recommend this?
Frankly it is probably the most accessible option for many people looking for outside eyes on their work, and it can also be incredibly fulfilling, supportive, and a source of great growth. My writers group was amazing and definitely helped me become a better writer and craft a better book.
So definitely do not discount this option, but be thoughtful and curious. Talk about what your expectations are and what you’d like to get out of the relationship. Exchange pages as a trial run to see if you feel like they’re on the same level as you, writing-wise. (There is NO SHAME in being a beginner but it’s probably best to take some classes to get the basics under your belt.)
Speaking of classes….
Writing Organizations
Look out for writing non-profits in your area. I’m fortunate enough to have Grub Street in Boston and I know several other cities have similar organizations. But if you live in a more rural location, don’t despair! Since the pandemic, many of these orgs are offering online/virtual classes, both live and asynchronous. Also check out community colleges and libraries!
Look for writing organizations that focus on your genre or audience. Here are a few. Many of these groups also have regional chapters and/or some kind of group (Facebook, Mighty Networks) to help make connections.
Historical Novel Society (HNS)
Happy writing, all!
Cheers ♥️
Kerry
BONUS PS: Back in the day, fellow book coaches Stephanie Dethlefs, Terri Thayer, and I had a little YouTube series called Dear Book Coach. In this episode, we gave advice about how to find community. Check it out!